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In the first couple years of my healing process I kept saying stuff like “well in all fairness to my mother, I was not the perfect daughter because of…. Just like I was trained to do; I was trained to look at me, always to look at me and my faults and to take the blame.
Looking at my faults is not such a bad thing, but the lack of mutuality in our relationship is a ridiculous thing.
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Most of the time people don’t even care to hear the reasons adult children have for not seeing their parents; they just tell these adult children they are wrong. It is even more offensive when the reasons for not seeing parents ARE revealed and people still judge the adult child to be the one in the wrong.
They automatically defend the parents without even hearing or caring about the reason behind the broken relationship. That is what this “what if your parents die” question is about.
“Darlene I have always been afraid that you would take your kids away from me and use them as a weapon against me”.
For those of you who do not know, Toulon is located on the south coast, between Marseilles and Nice. This new Lodge proved to be very popular with the academics at Trinity and is membership grew very quickly. W., His Grace the Duke of Leinster and the appointment of his successor, His Grace the late Duke of Abercorn, as M. In 1987 he was appointed Bishop of Connor, one of the oldest Dioceses in the Irish Church.It’s all in the voice infliction; the tone they use and I used to react to that tone in the way that I reacted to it when I was a kid.That tone was meant to snap me back to compliant and ‘respectful’ and it worked on me.“When someone is unrelentingly critical of you, always finds fault, can never be pleased, and blames you for everything that goes wrong, it is the insidious nature and cumulative effects of the abuse that do the damage.Over time, this type of abuse eats away at your self-confidence and sense of self-worth, undermining any good feelings you have about yourself and about your accomplishments.” The Emotionally Abusive Relationship by Beverly Engle Although this quote is aimed at the victim for the purpose of exposing how the self-esteem gets torn down, the first time I read this quote I thought of my mother and how much she said that I hurt her; she always said that I was the problem and that I did this to her ~ that I tore HER down; And overtime I believed that my words, actions and behavior (although I could not figure out what I was doing that was so offending) had eaten away at her self-confidence and harmed her sense of self-worth and undermined any good feelings that she ever had about herself and her accomplishments. I believed that I was the critical one and that I was the one doing all the damage.